Effing Funny Fertile Friday – "TMI" Infertilty Style
What you never wanted to know about your partner= Too Much Information (TMI).
You’ve seen each other in happy situations and in sad ones, but still, there are some things that you really wish you could unknow. Close your eyes and make it all go away.
TMI Infertility Style
Kind of like infertility. Wouldn’t that be the best? Close your eyes and it was all a bad dream. Just kidding, here’s the positive pregnancy test– you’re due in nine months. All a bad dream, that stupid infertility. Instead, you’re stuck waking up with the same depressing reality. No baby.
And then there are the other things you would like to wish away. What you’ve learned about your partner while experiencing infertility.
What you’ve learned about yourself too.
Here are a few examples of Too Much Information:
What kind of pornography they like to watch when they have to give a “sample”.
What kind of pads are used and for which days.
How high their hormone levels could go before irrational became a fond memory.
When they become Mayor of Crazyland.
How your partner/spouse could be so dense as to not know what day of the medication cycle you are on.
What they tell their friends/colleagues about why you still have no children.
How much better you feel after having a cuddle session with your “fur baby”.
That after two years of fertility treatment, they no longer bother to shave their legs for doctor’s appointments.
They wonder if their semen specimen is bigger or smaller than the last guys.
They estimate how much money they’ve spent on fertility treatment cycles and the man cave that they could have had instead.
They calculate how old they will be when their children turn 18, if they have children this year.
What they said when they were still under the effect of anesthesia.
That they get turned on by giving you a shot because they get to see your butt.
That their idea of a hot date is sitting on an ice pack while watching a movie that is guaranteed to make you cry.
That seeing pregnant bellies are guaranteed to make you run for cover.
Birth announcements are put into the shredder without even being read.
Best friends are avoided like the plague when they are on baby number three.
Feminine hygiene products are being used all month long.
It’s just too much information. Certainly not what you signed up for, not even close. Sickness and health? That doesn’t really cover menstrual cycles and masturbation, does it?
Or maybe it really does.
Maybe it covers all of it.
Maybe too much information is just what you need to know so that your partner doesn’t feel alone.
What do you think?
About Lisa Rosenthal
Lisa has over thirty years of experience in the fertility field. After her personal infertility journey, she felt dissatisfied with the lack of comprehensive services available to support her. She was determined to help others undergoing fertility treatment. Lisa has been with RMACT for eleven years and serves as Patient Advocate and the Strategic Content Lead.
Lisa is the teacher and founder of Fertile Yoga, a program designed to support men and women on their quest for their families through gentle movement and meditation.
Lisa’s true passion is supporting patients getting into treatment, being able to stay in treatment and staying whole and complete throughout the process. Lisa is also a Certified Grief Recovery Specialist, which is helpful in her work with fertility patients.
Her experience also includes working with RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association and The American Fertility Association (now Path2Parenthood), where she was Educational Coordinator, Conference Director and Assistant Executive Director.