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When We Isn't Me - We Don't Fit Into the Fertile World Right Now Blog Feature
Lisa Rosenthal

By: Lisa Rosenthal on October 9th, 2014

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When We Isn't Me - We Don't Fit Into the Fertile World Right Now

Feelings | Support | RESOLVE | The American Fertility Association | Pamela Madsen

The Fertile World - When We Isn't Me

when we isn't me, two upset womenWhen we doesn’t include me. That may be a very well known phrase.


It isn’t to me.


I heard it for the first time the other day on NPR (National Public Radio, not yet another Infertility acronym). The phrase caught my attention. I wish I could give credit to the speaker but I have no idea who was speaking at the time. If you know, could you please email me at FertileYoga@gmail.com?


Back to the point.

Managing the Fertility Treatment Process 

Why do we, I, you, feel so isolated, alone and lonely while managing the fertility treatment process?


Not all of us. Not all the time.


But a lot of us. A lot of the time.


That’s where this phrase comes in.


Me? I felt alone because I was alone. That was the simple answer. I didn’t know many other people, women, who were going through fertility treatment when I was. Thank goodness for my dear friend, Pamela Madsen, who eventually led me to Resolve and then to The American Fertility Association.


If it weren’t for Pamela, Resolve and The AFA, I would have been sunk.


Because we didn’t apply to me.


We were people who didn’t know they were having a problem having children.


We were having morning sickness and swollen ankles.


We were pregnant friends.


We were mommy and me programs.


We were happily married couples conceiving in the privacy in their own bedrooms.


We were the “normal” procession of dating, engagement, wedding, baby shower, baby. (How grateful are all of us for the new normal?)


We weren’t me.


No wonder I felt lonely. No wonder at all.


I found we in groups with Resolve and The AFA. That was my we. That was where I fit in, whether it was the we I really wanted to be part of or not, it was the we that I felt a part of. A place where we fit me.


Maybe you too don’t fit with we right now. Not the we that you are used to, anyway. There are other we’s. That’s what I found out.


Why not try Ladies Night In at RMACT? Carrie Van Steen and I would love to meet you. We have a place where you may fit right in.


The we you are looking for.



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About Lisa Rosenthal

Lisa has over thirty years of experience in the fertility field. After her personal infertility journey, she felt dissatisfied with the lack of comprehensive services available to support her. She was determined to help others undergoing fertility treatment. Lisa has been with RMACT for eleven years and serves as Patient Advocate and the Strategic Content Lead.

Lisa is the teacher and founder of Fertile Yoga, a program designed to support men and women on their quest for their families through gentle movement and meditation.

Lisa’s true passion is supporting patients getting into treatment, being able to stay in treatment and staying whole and complete throughout the process. Lisa is also a Certified Grief Recovery Specialist, which is helpful in her work with fertility patients.

Her experience also includes working with RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association and The American Fertility Association (now Path2Parenthood), where she was Educational Coordinator, Conference Director and Assistant Executive Director.